Farewell, Kelly ‘False Reminiscence’ Dever

And so farewell, Boston Police Officer Kelly “False Reminiscence” Dever, who first took a bullet for the workforce, and now takes a bullet to the top.

The official assertion from the BPD brass got here out Friday night, after the deadlines for morning papers. If the information is embarrassing, they at all times launch it on a Friday afternoon, for minimal public publicity.

If it’s actually horrible information, they drop it after enterprise hours on Friday evening.

In response to the BPD, False Reminiscence Dever was formally separated from the job Sept. 1, three months to the day after her train-wreck testimony in Karen Learn’s second homicide trial.

“My total job,” she informed protection legal professional Alan Jackson, in one in every of her uncommon outbursts of fact, “revolves round what I say on the witness stand proper now. If I used to be to lie, I lose my job. I lose every little thing.”

Now Kelly Dever has misplaced her job. She has misplaced every little thing.

You be the decide as to how in truth she carried out.

In Massachusetts, it nearly at all times pays to do the incorrect factor. However not one hundred pc of the time. Kelly Dever is that rarest of exceptions that proves the rule.

Earlier than she “resigned,” Dever had been out on medical go away because the trial. No official affirmation, but it surely was clear from her testimony that she had been stricken with a full-blown case of “Canton amnesia,” often known as Jennifer McCabe’s Syndrome.

This contagious illness has ravaged Norfolk County over the previous few years. The signs start with a go to by FBI brokers. They ask you questions, about something, and also you simply… begin mendacity. You’ll be able to’t assist your self.

First recorded case of Canton amnesia was Jennifer McCabe, one of many McAlberts. Two FBI brokers got here to her home and requested her to determine herself.

“Nicole Albert,” stated Jen McCabe. It’s a criminal offense to misinform federal brokers, until you do it in Canton. There isn’t a legislation south of the Neponset.

Then Nicole, er Jen, ran upstairs and made 5 cellphone calls to her co-conspirators, uh, kin and pals. When she returned to the feds after her 5 calls, the G-men requested her how many individuals she had phoned.

“Two,” she lied.

Because the probe unfolded, Kelly Dever was one in every of a number of low-rent Canton losers who couldn’t preserve their tales straight when questioned by the feds.

Dever first informed them that whereas on the Canton PD in 2022, she’d seen two of the shadiest cops in Canton — Kenny Berkowitz, the now-deceased chief, and ATF agent Brian “Butt Dial” Higgins — loitering round Karen Learn’s impounded SUV.

“For a wildly very long time,” she elaborated.

Then the powers that be in Norfolk county heard about what she’d stated, after which a outstanding sequence of occasions unfolded.

Quickly Kelly Dever had, in no explicit order, a brand new, a lot increased paying job on the Boston Police Division and a summons to the workplace of her new boss, Boston Police Commissioner Michael Cox, for a one-on-one interview.

At which era Cox could, or could not, have informed her to “do the proper factor.” Experiences differ, as they so usually do in Norfolk County.

No matter, Dever shortly recanted her earlier exact testimony to the FBI concerning the sinister doings by these two dodgy cops behind Karen Learn’s SUV.

This was vital as a result of this occasion that did or did or not happen occurred (or didn’t occur) simply earlier than these 45 or so items of pink tail gentle started showing on the entrance garden of the Boston cop the place the lifeless physique of the murdered Boston cop had been discovered.

At trial Dever accused Jackson of threatening to indict her for perjury. He then requested if she’d ever heard of anybody being indicted… by a protection legal professional.

No, she admitted. Bear in mind, Kelly Dever was a cop, however she additionally acknowledged that she had no thought what a sequestration order was.

Did I point out, she’s a graduate of Canton Excessive Faculty? And that she has a nasty case of break up ends on her hair?

After Karen Learn’s inevitable (second) acquittal, Alan Jackson wrote a scathing letter to Commissioner Cox mainly telling him that Kelly Dever was all by as a cop.

“If she lied beneath oath,” Jackson wrote, “Officer Dever is responsible of perjury. If she really suffers from false reminiscences, she is unfit to function a police officer.”

After her resignation yesterday, Jackson issued the next assertion:

“Ms. Dever’s departure from the BPD is a reminder that those that betray the general public belief can’t stay its guardians.”

Amen.